Clarity & Vision

Wow! Don’t you just love those days when everything clicks together in your mind?

Today is one of those days for me!

The clarity and vision that I am receiving feels life altering.

I have been on a journey, a journey of finding my passion. To do what I truly love most in life. That journey is to help as many moms as I can, find their passion. To be able to do what they truly love and still spend quality time with their family that they long to have.

I have been on a 4 year journey. A journey to find my passion, the thing I truly love most in life. The thing that inspires me. The thing that makes me feel like I’m on fire. The thing that I could sit and talk about all day and never tire of. I discovered that passion and now my journey involves a mission. My mission is to help other mom’s do what I did, to find their passion. To take that passion, that something they truly love, and create opportunities to live it while still spending quality time with their families.

My journey continues to lead me in many different directions. I find that sometimes I have to take a step back and analyze what is going to work best for my faith, my family and most of all, for myself. At times it feels like living my journey is an excruciatingly slow and even painful process. Other times, like today, things become amazingly clear and I feel invigorated!

I wish I could capture this feeling I have today, this clarity that surrounds me, and hold on to it. I wish I knew where it came from. How it happened. This is the recipe I want to share with other moms. This is something I wish everyone could feel. Maybe the recipe for this incredible feeling I have is this:

Follow your journey, discover your passion

Don’t get discouraged, re-evaluate

Arrive at a point in your life when YOU are ready for change

Make a commitment

DO IT!

For a long time I have struggled with what to do with my blog. I’ve followed my journey. I’ve discovered my passion. I’m at the point of change. I’m making a commitment. I guess it’s time for that final ingredient.

Let’s DO IT!

I’m making a commitment to start utilizing my blog as part of my mission to help other moms. Over time, I have struggled with what topics to cover. My coach Debbie Phillips (you can find her and Women On Fire on twitter and Facebook) knows my wish and knows my struggle. Once on a phone conversation I told her how I want to blog my honest truth about life as a mom…the struggles and the triumphs. I hesitate because I wonder how people will react to my truth! Will they relate to my struggles? Will they be inspired by my triumphs? Will I help anyone? Through Debbie I found Penelope Trunk’s blog. She is much like me, straight forward and honest. I love her honesty! When I saw that she has a little over 50,000 followers I thought, “WOW! Maybe people will accept my truths and join me in my continued journey and mission.”

So I’m just going to DO IT. I’m going to blog about my life; the trials, the tribulations, and the celebrations. The God’s honest truth. I hope it helps other moms out there. I hope my friends and family members understand, embrace, and support me.

Today it all came clear. This is the path I have to take. I’ve been holding it back too long. I’m letting it go. I’M DOING IT!

Today will be my first blog about my life; its joys and its struggles. It will be a blog about the Small Changes that I am making to become a better mother, wife, and friend. I hope to support and encourage others along the way. I hope to learn from you and you learn from me. My hope is to make you laugh, let you know that you are not alone, and most of all hopefully inspire you to make the Small Changes in your life that lead you to live the passion you deserve.

Here’s to the journey of the past, present and future and all the SMALL CHANGES along the way!!!

What is the most difficult job in the world? Being a parent!

In 1974 Nile (my husband) and his previous wife became parents at the young age of 16. With the help of his wife’s parents, and her parents, they succeeded in raising a well-rounded adult. Fast forward to today. Nile and I have been married for 7 years. Together we have a 6-year-old son and a three-year old daughter. His son is married and has a 5-year-old daughter and 2-year-old son. All this is a little history to help you understand my post.

November 15, 2009

Today Nile and I were purging paper work and came across an old file with applications, news paper articles, school tuition, etc. for his son. We even came across his baby teeth! Nile and I were reading, smiling, and laughing at old paper articles, photos, etc. We talked about what a great person his son is and how well he is doing now with his family and career.

We are at the point in our son’s life where he is loosing his teeth and we are beginning the frame work for the person we hope he will grow to be. Going through the paper work was fascinating for me to see. All that was involved in helping Nile’s oldest son to become the man he is, while we are doing the same with his little brother. I probably would not have looked at these as such precious treasures a year ago as I was not a parent yet.
It amazes me all that parents do to grow their children into, hopefully, well-functioning and successful adults. I can see how Nile played a BIG part in helping his son along in what is now his career. Guiding and directing him with his decisions, putting together resumes of his work, etc.

It might seem small to to his son, but now as a parent of a young one, I see all the small stuff Nile did on a regular basis that made his son in to the man his is today.

He is an impressive man!

Polite, articulate, professional, kind, and he is an AWESOME husband and father. He really is an impressive person. I easily see his father, mother, and grand parents in him.

He was fortunate to have had a wonderful combination of support from various family members. They all played apart of who he is. His grand parents that played a VERY big part in his life. With out them and his parents dedication to making it work, his life could have been totally different.

It is interesting to see what Nile’s son remembers versus what his parents remember. It helps me focus on what I need to do for my kids.

I personally have a VERY difficult time remembering anything that my mother did to help me become the woman who I am today. She was the only adult person in my life to influence me , so she obviously did all the work. Yet, I don’t feel she did anything. Why is that? Why can’t I see all the sacrifices she made for me? I carry very few positive memories of her when I was a child or even as an adult. Yet, I turned out to be a pretty great person and am proving to be a great mom. She was THE single biggest influence in my life! Regardless of how she did it, I am still grateful, because I do like who I am today. There are many life lessons she taught me that I am now teaching my children.

As children we are oblivious to what our parents are sacrificing for us. I worry, worry, worry, that my children will feel the same towards me when they become adults. It is my goal as a parent that my children love me, respect me, and have a close and healthy relationship with Nile and I, when they become adults. It is my BIGGEST HOPE AND DREAM in life! It sounds simple enough, but I know it will be hard work and even though I pour my heart and soul in to them, that one day they will turn away to go down their own path. That path may not include me in their life the way I hope to be. It’s painful to think about.

If you are a friend of mine on Facebook, you know that I love, love, love to post pictures! I do love photos, they are a great way to help tell a story. As a parent, I make photo story books for my children. (I just LOVE technology). I make them for two reasons. One is for them to have a way to remember and see all the blessings we as parents bring into their lives. The other is for me to remember all the great times and memories that I too may forget. I look forward to when they are adults and hearing what they remember about certain events, they will surely be totally different from the ones I remember. Another way that I try to preserve memories for them is that I keep cards in my van. When I have a spare moment, I sit and write to each child about what is happening in their lives. I don’t just right about the good stuff. I write about my struggles too. Parenting is not glamorous and neither is life. I want them to know that some of the most beautiful things in life come out of the most difficult times in our lives. I put each note in an envelope, seal it, then put their name and date on the outside of the envelope. All the cards are kept in a keep sake box for when they graduate, turn 21, possibly when they get married, or have kids. I will know when the time is right.

Everyday, I question my parenting skills and if what I am doing will affect my children in the long run. No one is a PERFECT parent, we all make mistakes. It is something I will have to accept as I grow and my children grow. I will be the best parent that I can be! I will continue to make the small changes necessary so that we can see the difference we’ve made in their lives. After all, isn’t it the small things that we remember the most? They always seem to make the biggest difference!